TCNJ

4 The College of New Jersey Magazine PRAIRIE THE NEXT CHAPTER Former TCNJ President R. Barbara Gitenstein looks back to move on. EVERYONE LOVES A GOOD LOVE STORY, and Barbara "Bobby" Gitenstein says the one she had with her husband, Donald Hart, was "remarkable." So much so that she plans to tell a chapter of their story — through their letters — in her next book. Hart passed away in August. While he was sick, Gitenstein read to him each night. It started with books, but then she remembered a box of letters from the fall of 1969 to the spring of 1970 that captured their budding relationship while she was finishing her undergrad at Duke and he was studying at the University of Alabama. They had just spent the summer together in their hometown of Florala, Alabama, and the letters were what kept them connected across their 616-mile divide. It was about a week before Hart died that Gitenstein read the last letter to him. Her book will be about "the importance of remembering people as they were, and as you want to remember them," says Gitenstein. She graciously shares snippets from a few of their first notes — and the last — here. SEPTEMBER 16, 1969 Dear Bobby, The proposition "out of sight, out of mind" may be true, but only in reference to Descartes and not toward you. (Translation: I love you). I am way over my head this semester — but I will read my way to the surface. Just for the record — 18 hrs. of philosophy. I am spoiled, for intellectual companionship in Florala (Alabama!) was more stimulating than here with 4,000 "scholars." Thank you again and again for being (ontologically and existentially) Bobby. I have an address, General Delivery, University, Ala. 35486. I also have a telephone — and although I'll probably never call you, you may call me collect any time you want to: 205-348-4593. (That sounds terrible, but you know what I mean.) Please write. I love you, Don SEPTEMBER 19 Durham, N.C. Dearest Don, What a wonderful welcome back to school your letter was! Reading it was (and of course is and will be) almost as beautiful as speaking with (or talking to) you. And just like my relationship with you — it wasn't really the first reading — but the second, etc., which became Don. And it has evoked that feeling which is characteristic of most of the time I've spent with you this summer — a sort of quiet, almost contained (which is almost unheard of in my nature), but intense, limitless joy. I do love you. I've finally gotten myself unpacked. Frankly, I can't believe it's done. But what a nice thing to have finished. I dislike it so. Already I can see how pleased I'm going to be with these living arrangements. I just don't think I could put up with a roommate for another year. I certainly hope that won't be an impossible work load for you. I can't imagine taking eighteen hours of one subject! I'm ashamed to even tell you how many hours I'm taking — just twelve. I love you, Bobby P.S. And in the same way in which you gave me your phone number, I give you mine: 919-684-2132. It's just in case you should need me one night when a letter just won't do. I miss you.

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